(Waving madly at you)  Sorry I’ve been MIA.  Life moves at warp speed!  But I’m here now so I shall begin the updates….

THE outfit update:  Has been located in closet in Tennessee.  UPS call tag will be issued to have said outfit returned to me.  Yippee! 

What did I do about the wedding?  Ya’ll axed it…here it is.

Decided on Plan-B outfit. Ya’ll know how I lurve me some Plan-B.  Cute black skirt with white embroidered pattern and a white twinset.  P.e.r.f.ec.t.  Yeah, okay.  No pantyhose.  I know what you all are saying, “Ewww!  I hate pantyhose.”  Yeah, well so do I, but my legs are so pale they could almost be deemed translucent.  At least this option would give me a faux shade of healthy color.  So, then it was on to Plan-C, which turned out to be a good thing…you’ll hear why later.  Plan-C was a pair of pin-striped slacks and aforementioned twinset with my favorite black loafers (not a heels chick, either). 

Will looked nice in his slacks and shirt; he was spared the tie.  Olivia’s frock was pressed and gorgeous, but she got changed in the gas station parking lot on our last potty break.   During said break, Will bought me a Twix and a Diet Coke.  Well, I was wearing a white top so I made extra special care so as to not drop chocolate on my sweater.  I didn’t!  As I was getting Fabul-O out of the car, he screams, “You have something on your butt.  What.Did.You.Do?”  I answered him in my it’s-so-freaking-hot-and-she-won’t-get-away-from-the-dirty-tires voice, “I.Don’t.Know.  You have been with me in the same car for the past two hours.  What could I possibly have done?”  It turned out it was his fault.  Remember the Twix bar he bought me? Well, apparently a hunk of chocolate fell, unnoticed, between my legs on the seat and the last ten minutes of my drive were just enough to bake it nicely into the seat and into the back of my pants.  Woo-hoo!  One baby wipe and some Sprite later, my pants were not noticeable, but the chocolate arse print on my car seat?  Well, let’s just say there’s an appointment in my future to have the interior cleaned.  So we make it into the church for the wedding.

Olivia freaked out – I think mainly because of the pipe organ.  I held her close and after the bridal party and bride marched in, she decided, “I DON’T WANT TO BE HERE.”  (That will be cute when they watch the wedding video, right?)  Before anyone gets on the “you’re so rude, child at wedding, blah, blah, blah wagon…Yes, we were at the back of the church just in case something happened and it was a big sanctuary and I checked with the bride to make sure it was okay if I brought her since we were headed to visit our friend who is deploying afterwards.  Two potty breaks, one round of negotiations, and swiping of every piece of literature the lobby had got us back to hear the last part of the ceremony.  Why didn’t we take something to keep her entertained?  Sweating in the 9000 degrees of the afternoon sun scraping chocolate off my tushie caused me to forget it and it was quite the hike back.

The bride was someone I went to high school with.  So, I figured there would be someone from high school I knew there that would give me someone to talk to.  There was one.  I thought I recognized her, so I asked her name. (I’ve been out of high school for 17 years and see very few people from that time in my life and we’ve not had a reunion of any sort)  Okay, so we’re at the elevator heading down to the reception and we start chatting.  I gasped.  She was wearing my PLAN-B skirt and the outer layer of my twinset – the same one I was wearing.  She spiced hers up with a red tank and some super cute shoes.  So I was actually glad to have worn my Soprano-esque pants.  Can you imagine: Seeing her for the FIRST time since graduation and we show up at a wedding wearing the.same.thing.  I wouldn’t have re-introduced myself. I would have hung out by the punch fountain.  (Dudes and -ettes: I LURVE me some green wedding punch)

Fabul-O ate more butter mints and peanuts than should be humanly allowed and sucked down the great green punch and then professed her utter hatred for anywhere but home.  Out of the corner of my eye, I noticed the receiving line and bee-lined.  We talked for a minute, had a piece of cake and had to hit the road; we had dinner reservations with our other friends in a town two more hours away.  We pimped Uncle D and Aunt T until she collapsed from the sugar high.  Will and I had slight melt down on the interstate, but we managed to pull it together and had a wonderful evening with lots of love from the kids and a great dinner.  Good friends, cheese fries, blooming onion, bread, butter, and a big ‘ol plate of pasta with shrimp swimming in Alfredo sauce.  That makes for a wonderful evening.  Big hugs and not wanting to let go, we said our good-byes and hit the road.  This was a combined brain child idea.  We left home at 11:20 a.m.  It was now 10:20 pm and a solid 3 1/2 hours from home.  Collectively, we had this wonderful idea: The likelihood of us going to bed before 1 a.m. was slim and none and we’d have to get up super early to drive home because Will was going to have to work for a few hours on Sunday anyway so why not just drive home Saturday night.  About 20 minutes into our trip I was out.  Will woke me up 40 minutes later to tell me he was tired and I needed to drive.  So I did.  Thank goodness for iPod, XM and random radio stations.  So, we covered about 465 miles on Saturday in our whirlwind round trip.  We did get to sleep a little late and actually got about the same amount of sleep had we stayed over so it was good.

D begins his deployment journey in single digit days.  We wish him all the best and we want T and those fantabulous kiddies to know we’re right here if they need us. 

Not one single picture taken all day.

Obviously, updates are working backwards, but I’m pleased as great green wedding punch to have accomplished this one.